Offal Industries 'No-More-Comedown' Ointment

Don’t let your Tuesday ruin your Saturday. 100% non-organic beef dripping-based salve replaces lost serotonin and self-induced post-weekend existential terror with the homeostatic synthesis of a cosy Sunday afternoon lunch with your gran. Apply liberally to perineum every Tuesday at daybreak for rapid relief. Not for use with base amphetamine-caused psychosis or techno-utopian K-holes. As advertised by Adam Curtis in Season 3, Episode 4 – 'Offal Made Me Hardcore'.